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05/17/2017

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It is normal.
For 13
AND 3.
I'll share one of favorite gems from a conference I attended once:
"Don't pick up the rope".
When your child offers you an argument, just refuse to pick up the rope. I have been remaining silent quite often lately as I know my teenager is just baiting me and hoping that we can have a verbal tug of war.
More than 1/2 of my tongue is gone from biting it but it has definitely reduced the struggles we had :-)

Julie

Julie, I love this. "Dont pick up the rope." i will remember that the next time I'm tempted to engage in a tug of war. Hopefully our tongues grow back as our kids mature;)

Very typical of 13! "I should have the day off tomorrow because _________" fill in the blank. No discussion will make a dent because the underlying reason is "I don't want to" and how do you reason round that? And mood swings. I am trying to use a loving voice instead of growling back but boy howdy, is that hard some days. And yeah, a loving voice . . I think that is a form of not picking up the rope. That's a good thought, I like that.

A loving voice, thank you Mary, so true that how we respond can make all the difference.

It is normal for 13...and 3...love that. I have both. A 13 year old boy...a 3 year old boy...a teenager and a threenager. Fun times. My 13 year old is "typical" however, he is burdened with "generalized anxiety".

"When we ask him to entertain himself, without a screen, he sits in his chair at the table doing nothing. Or interrupts our conversations with questions he already knows how to answer."

...or he instigates quarrels with his 3 year old brother. Or starts a "tug of war" with me about all the reasons that because of his anxiety he "NEEDS" to have his screen...and most times I pick up the rope...will need to work on that one!

When I read your stories of Elias..whom I have been following since I discovered your blog just months before your post about him walking for the first time...I've always compared your stories to mine as Jeremy is the same age.

I don't know if this will help or not...but over the 10 years of reading his story..your story..there are way more similarities in our parenting journey than differences.

So, to answer this question....very typical of 13.

And I have to say...with a three year old in the house too...some times I wish I could reverse him back to 3...some times I wish that I could fast forward him to 33...and sometimes I wish I could just have a break from him. But the days that we connect...as few as there may be...it is amazing and I wouldn't want to change him at all.

I believe these are the moments sent by God to keep me going.

Keep on keeping on...

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