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That's amazing...maybe he figured it out because J was sad ;)
Keep trusting your mama instincts and looking at the whole person. We are all more than the sum of our parts, anyway. And when it gets tough, have yourself that cry. God knows you've earned it.
It sounds like your IEP team really means well...and human nature being what it is, the fact that you can't dislike them makes it all the harder because you have to acknowledge the rightness of the path you're on, which means acknowledging (as you do) where Elias is at right now. But what is great is that you can also acknowledge his strengths--as you just did.
Hang in there.


It doesn't matter how many problems Elias may have or anyone else's kids because the fact remains that they will always surprise us. We are so blessed to have these little people in our lives even when we want to pull the covers up over our heads sometimes and pretend they aren't ours. The way I see it, Elias has so many other things that he is working on that empathy may have to wait. It may also be that he is trying hard to read peoples expressions/reactions but hasn't made sense of it all yet. I find that sometimes amazing progress is being made but in an unmeasurable way for us parents to recognize....do you see? Sometimes we don't recognize what is in front of us either.

Hang in there. You are doing your best. Your best is phenomenal. Inspirational. Of course you're overwhelmed thinking of all the goals and must dos and tasks broken down into bits and pieces that comprise parenting. Learning to be from scratch. More mountains to climb- more summits to cheer on! GO TEAM ELIAS!

I always feel better after writing. And having such wise and compassionate readers sure helps my soul.

As the mother of a baby who died, living in a world full of people, family included, who refuse to acknowledge my son was ever alive, I say "thank you" to Elias. You're doing many things right, Christy. This proves it.

Christy, this is so beautiful and so heartbreaking...and I can relate to it so, so much. Thank you for sharing.

Ginny,your son was alive and I too wish there were a stamp to honor him. I'm sorry that our society doesn't do better at supporting grief, and death, and allowing us to talk openly with family and friends about the people we have lost. Especially babies. People seem to think you can just move on b/c you "didn't know your son for long." As if you didn't start loving him and making space for him and changing your life for him the moment you knew you were pregnant. And you cant go back to who you were before.

Thank you Lisa for writing.

Another beauty of a post here, Christy. I'm sure it does often seem overwhelming when you think of all this stuff that Elias needs to work on, but then he just sneaks something like that comment in and you remember how far he has come. Even if some days the progress feels glacial with one step forward and two steps back, it's still progress. Hang in there and keep writing!

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