Perspective Shift

Since I last wrote I spent a stretched out minute on my hands and knees under a table as the earth shook, staring into the scared eyes of one of my students, wondering if this was the next Big One.

"This is exactly what I was talking about," I whispered as the rumbling grew before it diminished.

Seconds earlier, we sat across from each other at the small round table in my counseling office. "What did you mean when you said I hate my life?" I asked.

"Its just how I felt in that moment," he answered.

"I understand. I feel that way sometimes too.  And sometimes we just have to remember that the world is so much bigger than how we feel in this moment."

And that is exactly when the earth made her presence known. 

A small tremble at first.

"Earthquake, " I said, as we both held onto the edge of the table. 

Then a jolt that sent us both to our hands and knees, wide eyed, as the shaking continued to rock the building.

"This is why we have to appreciate all that we have," I said while still under the table, talking as much to myself as to the sixth grade boy in my presence.

I told this beautiful child with tears in his eyes that his family loved him, I loved him, and everything was gonna be OK.

And it was.

The school sustained no damage and no one was injured, just a bit shook up.

I gave Elias a hug when I saw him in the hall later that day, "Did you feel the earthquake?" he asked.

"Yes, yes I did."

And sure life is still hard, and I don't have all the answers I seek, but something settled in my soul when the earth finally lay still.

Tonight when I lay beside Olive, she sat up and took a small heart rock out of a little black cat purse she keeps on her windowsill."This is my peaceful rock," she said. "When I hold it in my hands I feel peaceful."

And I guess that's what the earthquake did for me. A pause amidst the struggles of parenthood, like the rainbow that emerges after days of rain.

The next day, as I walked passed the boy who shared the space beneath the table with me, when we weren't sure if the world would open up and swallow us whole, he smiled and gave me a thumbs up.

I gave him a big smile back.

And ever since the earth shook me awake, my smile has been a bit easier to find.

Comments

[Kate]

Just what I needed today. Love this. Thanks.

[Christy]

Thank you Kate:)

[Louise]

wow, that is one amazing opening section. I saw it in my mind like a film, except with your perfectly blended overlay of poetry and reality. Lovely. Hope your smiles keep feeling easier, my friend.

[Christy]

Ah, Louise, you made my heart sing with your kind words. Thank you for the feedback friend:)

[Greta]

We all need a little shake up sometimes. (Someone had to say it!)