1) Winter break ends in a matter of hours, and you could say I'm in denial, as I sit here at my kitchen table, drinking wine, as if my schedule is still all mine.
2) I spent a lot of time during this vacation sitting on my parents couch, coloring, like I did as a child, as my own children clamored for Nana and Papa's attention-- my Mom and Dad rose to the occasion, giving Nick and I the gift of relaxation, something I've forgotten to do for the last eleven almost twelve years.
3) On Christmas day, Nick and and I kayaked through Nauset Marsh, on Cape Cod, as unusually warm weather graced the East Coast, giving us a wind-free 60 degree paddle through mirror-water as the seabirds sang their tunes.
4) Today, I peeled the last of my garden carrots, the odd shapes ones from the bottom of the fridge drawer that finally revealed themselves, in full, to me:
5) On January 12th, I'll stand on a stage at the Performing Arts Center and share a seven-minute story in front of 700 people. I submitted an essay I wrote about dipnetting and when I met with two members of the Story Board they told me that in its current too long version my story was 90% dipnetting and 10% Elias and they wanted me to swap those percentages.
By the way, no notes are allowed on stage.
So if you've wondered at all where I've been over these past two weeks, don't worry, I've still been writing. (And trying to memorize). Tickets for Arctic Entries go on sale Tuesday the 5th at 2:00 and I'm told they sell in a matter of minutes, so I'm guaranteed a full house. (More wine please.)
I know many of you can't be there, so I'll share an audio link after the event if you'd like to listen.
6) I ran today on the ice trails through the woods, with screws in my shoes, and I still slipped often. I ran with our pup Lola who loves to sprint far ahead of me on the trails, a six-month old running fiend who pulls me too fast when on leash. On a couple of the trickier parts, where her paws slid across the icy path, instead of continuing on at mock speed, she'd stop, and look back, as if willing me not to fall.
7) I'm thinking its time for a new blog title, as a second child myself with all my past you-love-him-more rants over my brother's bigger stocking and baby book and well, I don't want to minimize the existence of Olive. But I don't want to lose readers or take the time to set up a whole new page so I may be thinking about this, without acting, for awhile.
8) "Mom can I have another one of those chewy chocolate nut things?" Olive asks.
"They're called turtles and no, not now, you haven't even had breakfast yet." My girl got the Everett gene for sweets and the holidays sure make it hard to deny all those cravings.
"But Mom, they have nuts in them. They're healthy." Oh and she got my ability to rationalize every bad decision.
9) On Christmas Eve we gathered with my parents' neighbors and participated in one of those gift exchanges where people can swap gifts based on a hierarchy of numbers. I warned my Mom that this might not go over well with my kids. Elias being rigid and particular and Olive being newly six. So we made a plan for the kids not to swap but then someone at the party said they could trade gifts if they wanted to and well, Elias sure as hell did want to trade his binoculars for Olive's pop-up game or one of the other children's presents but no one wanted to engage his wish.
My eleven-year-old boy teetered on the edge of a freak out so I told him, "Elias, I have a good number for the adult swap and whatever I get I'll trade with you." This calmed him down and when they announced 15 I grabbed a big gift bag with a picture of Santa Claus. I reached in and pulled out a flashlight and you'd think we opened a trip to a water park with elevator rides.
"Yes! Yes! I wanted this!" Elias bounced up and down and clapped his hands. "This is exactly what I wanted!"
I announced to the three adults left to choose that this gift was officially off limits for a trade. The older gentleman who brought the flashlight smiled and said, "It floats too, ya know."
10) I vow to relax a little more this year. To pull out my markers and color between the lines. To write for myself in a way that makes me want to share it with others. To love deeply and go easy when I fall.
11) Thank you readers for being here too. For giving me a reason to return again and again to this place where I wrestle with words to reveal meanings. It wouldn't be the same without you.
So glad your break has been good. Ours was, too, lots of reading, games, friends, only some pubescent ranting and angst. Oh, and on January 1 ... you'll get a kick out of this ... my 8 year old woke me up at 8:02 by announcing VERY LOUDLY and proudly that he had slept til a whopping 8:01.
Wishing you all a happy, healthy, restful ... yeah, right... 2016.
Posted by: Danielle | 01/04/2016 at 12:48 AM
I have been reading since the start. So excited for you and your performance. I can't wait to hear the audio. Your words have always had meaning to this mother and pediatric ICU nurse practitioner.
Posted by: Abby | 01/04/2016 at 01:45 AM
Only a quickie because we are back to reality this morning too. Beautiful as always. CANT WAIT FOR YOUR TALK! I know it will be amazing so please do post the link. I too am going to try a little more self care this year. Four days in but it's helping. Well played on the gift swap and the turtle and wish we could commit to a dog like yours right now.
Posted by: Kate | 01/04/2016 at 04:33 AM
Sounds like you are heading into the new year filled with the things you need like Love, Relaxation, Time and Family. Cheers to you fabulous writer and friend!
Posted by: fleming ackermann | 01/04/2016 at 05:41 AM
So good to wake up this morning and hear from four long-time readers. Keep up the relaxation if you can and I'll try to harness a little more stress-free time as well.
Danielle, your story reminded me that on the morning we flew out of Boston we had to wake up at 4:15 to get from our hotel room to our gate and Elias woke up at 4:00 when Nick got out of bed and talked for fifteen minutes about when we needed to wake up and that we were going to the airport but would not get out of bed until the pre-determined time, all the while I was just wanting to sleep for a blessed 15 more minutes but to no avail:)
Happy New Year friends!
Posted by: Christy | 01/04/2016 at 09:46 PM
HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU IN ALASKA! Sounds like 2015 ended so well.... Your readers appreciate all that you share, and especially how such weighty matters still leave room for you to entertain with humor, at times.
Posted by: StorkWatcher | 01/05/2016 at 09:04 AM
Looking forward to hearing your talk as well. You write so well I'm sure it will be fantastic. Love your family picture by the way!
Posted by: tonikayerieger | 01/05/2016 at 09:42 AM
I wouldn't survive without a sense of humor, StorkWatcher:) Thanks for your support! And thank you tonikayerieger for the vote of confidence. Tickets sold out in under five minutes which makes me nervous. I'll definitely share when I'm done.
Posted by: Christy | 01/06/2016 at 07:27 PM